Well, before starting, I want to apologize to my online friends for delaying this story for such a long time. I was waiting for my board exams to be over because I didn't want any drama in my life. This story was actually supposed to be published on my personal Telegram channel, but here we are. No worries—this story will be as transparent as I can make it. I have never been in a relationship, but I liked some girls during my school life. Looking back on those days, I feel blessed for what happened and have no regrets.

It was my first day in seventh grade, and as always, my friends were reassigned to different sections, leaving me alone in my class. I never had any close friends until ninth grade, so it didn't actually bother me. I had self-esteem issues back then and always struggled to talk to people. I was well-behaved throughout my school life, except for having occasional fights with my peers. At that time, I had a crush on a former classmate with whom I had been in the same class since fifth grade. I had no intention of liking any other girl at that time. Gradually, I noticed a girl and became interested in her because she was so quiet, well-behaved, and had all the manners I expected from other students, which was rare at my school.

Over time, I started losing feelings for my former classmate and began developing feelings for this new girl. But I wasn't the only one who liked her; there was another boy who was always clingy with her, and by twelfth grade, he was her boyfriend. Such irony, I know—I even laughed, but their relationship was well-known. I started sitting in the same row as her, being around her, but I never had the courage to talk to her. I used to exchange notebooks with her to complete my assignments. I sat in the same row, but that boy used to sit behind her, which often irritated me, but I was okay with it.

One day, that boy asked me to call my crush "Sister-in-law," which actually annoyed me a lot, but I ignored him. He used to follow her, talk to her, and was very clingy at the time. I spent my time with my new friends, who were mostly toxic except for one who is now my closest friend. The girl I used to like eventually left my life, and I had no feelings for her anymore, but with this new girl, I always tried to see if I could run into her somewhere outside of school by coincidence, but it never happened. I got many rejection signs, like being blocked on the second day of talking to her, which bothered me a bit, but I didn't feel too sad.

I always lived in my own world, happy and constantly overthinking. I used to listen to romantic Punjabi songs back then, which made my feelings even stronger. A year passed, it was eighth grade, and about 2-3 months before the lockdown in India, we were having a class photo taken, which we never received, but it was my happiest moment. While the photo was being taken, I was in the middle of all the girls, smiling, and my crush was right beside me. One boy started crying, and somehow I realized he also liked the same girl I did. In class, he warned me to stay away from her, and as a kid, the first thing I did was share it with my friends. Later, this information spread all around the school.

My friends started teasing me with her name, and one boy, who wasn't really my friend, shared it with everyone. The first thing I did was ignore everybody. I started accepting that it was better for me to move on and focus on my studies. I ignored everyone to the extent that they became pretty annoyed with me. Thankfully, final exams were approaching, and during the last exam, our prime minister announced a lockdown due to COVID-19. I spent two years at home, and once, I missed her, so I finally decided to install Instagram in ninth grade just to follow her and other schoolmates. I started posting memes on my account, and then suddenly one day, she unfollowed me and also removed me from following her. But this time, my feelings weren't that strong, so I took it as a blessing and didn't feel sad because I had already accepted the situation well.

It's not always necessary that the person you like will have the same feelings for you. It's always better to accept things that are beyond your control and move on. Many people will come and go in your life, and it's totally okay for it to be that way. I liked her, but she didn't like me back. It hurt me then, but it also made me stronger. I started learning new hobbies, which later worked out, and I moved on without much trouble.

“In the end we discover that to love and let go can be the same thing.”
– Jack Kornfield